Total Abandon

What is worship? How can we honor God by praising him? What would it look like for someone to completely lay down their desires and abandon all that they hold dear?

The greatest act of worship we can give is the act of surrender. If we kneel at the foot of the cross and say, "Lord you can have all of me. My hopes, my fears, my strengths, my sorrows, my heart, mind, souls, dreams, and abilities. You can take it all God. I want you to empty me so that all I have left in me is You."

So many times I find myself saying, "Oh, God. Take my sorrows, my fears Lord. Maybe you can have my heart too...well, only this part of it. Someday I'll be able to give up my dreams, but not now Jesus, I just can't."

Yes Rachel, you can. Christ only died for you! What kind of a message was Jesus sending when He lay down his life? Was he saying, "I give you half of me."? No. He gave us everything. He was stripped of any possible earthly glory. He was beaten beyond recognition. His head, that could have been wearing a heavenly Prince's crown, was adorned with thorns; pressed deep into His scalp. His hands, the hands that healed the sick and fed the hungry, where pierced through. His feet, the feet that carried him to the hill where he died, were also pierced for out transgressions. Like a thief, a sinner condemned to die, so He died. Blameless and innocent, He looked out over the people who had come to watch Him suffer. Was He cursing them? No. He was praying for them, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do." Even on the cross, He was interceding for us. His Father turned away from Him, because the sin that was upon His shoulders was great.

Can you imagine the emptiness Jesus must have felt? Can you imagine truly being emptied of your glory, your lifeblood, your loved ones?

If Christ had come and said, "You know what, I'm only going to do this half way. I'm not going through with this..." Maybe we would have a fraction of an excuse not to die as Christ died, to abandon all and lay at the foot of the cross.

So...why is it that we have such a hard time letting go? Why do you want your sin, shame, and sorrows anyways? He came that you might throw all of it upon Him. But, He doesn't ask for only the dirt in your life. He wants all of your life. He wants you to be emptied of this world so that He can begin to fill you with things that are eternal and worthy.

Picture two armies. One infinitely greater than the other. 



The blood soaks into the grass and mud, dead soldiers lie in the wet. Wounded cry out for help. The smaller army shrinks at the feet of the greater force. A murmur goes up among the ranks as a soldier slowly emerges. Agonizing pain shoots through his side, the place where a sharp blade had met its mark. He looks haggard and worn. His armor is beaten and dented, his former robes of glory and headship, torn and tattered. No longer able to proceed, he drops to his knees, his arm pressed to his wound. Blood stains his tunic, telling the tale of lost bravery and courage.

The leader of the larger army watches carefully. His thoughtful eyes welling with tears as compassion and love overflow. 

The wounded man looks up from the earth into the face of his opponent. The expression of kindness on the other man's face melts all of his former fears.

"Lord, here I am. Only me...[looks at bloody side] and this bitter reminder of my transgressions kneel before you now. I am wasted and spent, worthless and dying. I have watched fellow men die on this field for three days. I no longer hold the power to fight. I give this [motions about] to you. Here, my sword. Take my pain, sorrows, fears, longings, lusts, failings, angers, hopes, dreams, loves, and desires. Take it, all of me, and make me new again, for if you don't, I fear I will die before morn comes again."

He bowed to the earth and pressed his body in the mud and dirt.

"I abandon all to you, Lord."

As Christ looked on, the small battered army began to fall to its knees. The only thing left standing; a rusted crucifix on a bloody pole in the midst of the army.

Christ reaches out his hand, lifting the wounded to his feet again.

"You are forgiven and you will become new."

Just that picture gives me chills.

When you surrender your heart to your Creator, you are performing the most beautiful act of worship. With the Spirit at work within you, you can get to the breaking point. The point where you can drop to your knees and say, "God, I surrender all. I am completely and totally in your power. Bend me and break me, take me and remake me."

Easier said than done right?

Complete Abandon,

~Rachel 

Step Back, Let Go

          I've got to stop taking myself so seriously. I mean, what does it really matter what people think of me? If I smile like me, talk like me, laugh like me, joke like me, and act like me, why should I care what other people think? I make funny faces when I talk, I can't express myself without hand motions, I tend to fidget when I am trying to explain something of great importance, I make grammatical and spelling errors in letters, emails, and posts (not for lack of trying! Trust me, I read over things a hundred times and still miss stuff!), I wear glasses whenever I watch a movie, I love reading aloud to myself, I eat cranberries with my mashed potatoes on Thanksgiving, I climb trees better than any girl would like to admit, I talk too much (?), I am more country than most expect, I am a sinner, and I like to belt out worship songs when no one else is around (sadly, most of the time there are people near by that I am not aware of). Wow, this is me. A bad thing? No. I'm not proud of the sinner in me. I'm not exactly excited about the funny faces when I talk, but to be honest, it isn't hurting anything!

(If she only knew!)

 

 

          Please don't try to be someone else. Yes, you can be the new you. The new creation in Christ. But don't fret about the quirks that God created you with. They are all part of you. Your abilities and gifts are unique to God's plan. Hey, you never know, maybe someday someone will fall in love with that crooked smile of yours, or those silly expressions you make. Know that someone already has fallen in love with you and your "problems". Know that the one who created them has had his eye on you ever since he had the blueprint of you drawn up in his magnificently sovereign mind. God is watching you, praying over you, and planning for you. He has written your story, all you have to do is watch as the pages unfold before you. Praise God that he has a plan for that strong voice, those funny jokes, or that beautiful laugh of yours!

          Pray that Christ would show you ways you can turn your "quirks" into his glory. You will find that the less you try to squash your true personality, that it starts to become more and more beautiful. Please don't be dismayed about the little things! Worry more about your sinful nature, try to fight against it. Don't expend your energy battling something that God wants you to have and keep. Can you think of anything more futile than that?  Stop taking yourself so seriously. Step back, and let go. Guess who is right beneath you? Christ is there to catch you when you stumble.

          I promise to stop taking myself so seriously...(did I really just say that?) Now you have to as well :) There is nothing more freeing than letting go and saying, "God, I am all yours. Take me and remake me." I'm not saying that you should ask Him to make you taller, shorter, thinner, or smaller, but ask him to change you from the inside out. Once your heart has been washed with the blood of the Lamb, you will be forever changed. Forever new.

         I believe that God wanted me to write this post as much or more for myself than for any of you. I am so thankful that God has been able to use y'all (my dearest readers) to work in my life! Thank you so much for your support, prayers, and comments!

Not so seriously (in a good way), but always truly yours,

~Rachel